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Thursday, December 5, 2013

The LifeStyle Change when Relocating...

Recently, I was discussing both of our relocations to the DMV area.  Essentially we both came to the area for the same reasons... Our significant other received a lucrative offer and we supported them.  When  doing the research to determine my own move I looked at the normal things... Rent, Taxes, Distance to nearest City, etc.  At the time of my move, my company was allowing me to work remotely from my new location so I didn't need to research child care.  Well, months after my move to the DMV I was offered a position which nearly doubled my salary and I was all too excited at the opportunity.  Unfortunately, in my research for the area I had never looked into Child Care and was dealt a huge blow once I realized the cost.  We tried the Daycare thing for a while but realized that because of traffic and other work related factors, we were not making it home in time to make the Daycare cut off time of 6:30pm.  Then, we would get home and still need to cook dinner, clean the house somewhat, do laundry, look over homework.  The list goes on and on.  Quickly, the thought of a nanny became appealing.  Again, this was not an expense we had factored into the cost of living when we considered relocating.

This all was a lesson learned very quickly.  Back in Virginia Beach we had friends and a support system that worked well for our young family.  Here in the DMV we do not have any of that and when things go wrong in our daily plan we do not have backup options besides ourselves.  This change in lifestyle was something we did not consider AT ALL.  Child care expenses, increased gas cost due to traveling to/from work and eating more take out food because of time constraints also kept us from visiting our friends as much as we anticipated.  While my friend who I had this conversation with does not have children, we both agreed that the loss of friends to make more money almost isn't worth it looking back.  And, truly it doesn't feel like we are making "more" money once everything else is added into the equation.

If you have been through something like this then I am sure you have had this conversation many times with your significant other as I have had it a million times with my husband.  If we were able to do it all over again, we wouldn't.  BUT, that was a lesson we wouldn't have learned without this experience.  He has had almost a handful of positions offered to him in various locations across the United States since we have lived here and we have turned them all down.  It's so easy to look at the dollar signs in a job offer but money can't always buy you the lifestyle you want for your family.

3 comments:

  1. This definitely hits home for me. We relocated for the same reason. We've always had a nanny because of our unpredictable hours. But when we relocated this last time...good help was hard to find. It took some time before we found someone that was right for our family.
    I miss my friends and family dearly. However I feel this move was part of God's plan for us. We've both grown tremendously from this experience. It has been painful, but I know this chapter of our lives have made us stronger.

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    1. I can definitely agree with you on the growth not only you as couple will go through but even the family as whole. Only having each other to depend on definitely makes each one of us more responsible for each other than before. We have been without our nanny for 3 weeks now and though my peace of mine is still not there, my family is functioning much better than I expected! Like you said, its all in His plan and He will make it work!

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